relahvant:

when i make a joke to myself and no one’s around to hear it

image

image

(via sorry)

resohlve:

if i was a type of sauce i’m pretty sure i’d be hot sauce ;)

(via sorry)

skypestripper:


my mom is a dick

skypestripper:

my mom is a dick

(via pizza)

untexting:

i’m that kind of person who between two choices always pick the wrong one

(via sorry)

deaneggsandsam:

adult: “do u know what college you want to go to yet?”

me: [sweats nervously] MONSTERS UNIVERSITY

(via margybear)

justnabingaround:

+

(via duhvinchi)

unacted:

You should date me cuz:

  • I make a great bowl of cereal
  • We would have beautiful children
  • I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU

(via sorry)

minimist:

but why are crop tops more expensive than normal tops

(via sorry)

(Source: hustled, via magicul)

shouldnt:

shouldnt:

Easter is on 4/20 this year

make sure to say high to the Easter Bunny!!

(via sorry)

parmesan:

Do you just randomly cry when someone does the smallest thing that ticks you off and suddenly you remember everything annoying

(via sorry)

(x)

(Source: brieflyshaking, via pakowska)

unclefather:

when i’m famous i’ll remember that you unfollowed me

(via cumfort)

lustinghipbones:

x